As I was talking with my good friend, I was telling him how my perceptions about almost everyhting has changed within the last couple of years. It was then I realised how much taking a snapshot of the state of mind helps when you want to look at the path of the mind. One thing is for sure. This mind is a great traitor.
What it touts at one moment as THE THING to pursue, a few moments later, it simply ditches it only to go after some other thing. Let me recount the things that mattered to me the most in the last 20 odd years of "eating-doing various levels of insane things-sleeping" routine. What follows looks pretty stereotypical to me. Anyways, i feel like recording this and hence this crap post.
In the early school going days, it was the madness for first rank. Even if I miss the rank in only one out of the 10 tests held every year, that one night I would sleep crying. Amma used to find it out from the long face I used to have following such disasters (that was what it used to be). It was after the 10th board exams that this desire for rank 1 lost a bit of its' hold.
Next came the desire to get into the best engineering colleges available. The pursuit began. And when it was done, the next attraction took possession of my mind. I always had this notion that one needed to study only till 12 th and then freak out (thanks to the tons of tamil movies that wallow with college and the "so-called-love" life). Yeah, the next attraction was the fairer sex. I still remember the air I used to have around me when walking into college during my first semester. It used to say "I am a COLLEGE STUDENT and I am here PRIMARILY to sight-adichufy". This attraction was something that took over my mind when I was probably in my 10th standard (when the adoloscence started showing its existence), but I held it suppressed for fear of losing out in the competitive exams.
Then the mind wandered away to point out that a "top notch job" was the thing to pursue. After sometime, it again started grousing that management studies should boost the resume better. For some strange reason I don't feel like writing anymore. So cutting it short. Other things which it said were the most important things are: great career recognition, world-wide recognition/innovation, money, power...
The cacophony hasn't stopped. But I have ear sponges using which I can comfortably ignore the noise...
Renewal: The Statue of Unity
6 years ago
