Note: I am in a real nasty frame of mind... The ensuing contents will be pure rubbish...Read at your own discretion...
I am totally clueless...What do I want to do...It is at this time period when some major changes are happening...at least in lives of my friends...the girls are getting committed/married...the guys are switching jobs, pursuing higher studies, trying to find themselves a partner... Well these are minor peeves...
But the major cause of my current commotion is, what really do I want to do? Suddenly I find that of the few things I am capable of doing, nothing is making sense to me...Writing code, pursuing an MBA...nothing is making sense... As if these are not enuf, that damned fone call...forget it, I am not gonna speak about it...
Looking at the problems around me sets me thinking...take the case of Vidharba farmers...India is definitely good at intellectual power...If there are so many intelligent people around, with at least a scintilla of humanity, why do these suicides occur...Is it because I chose to remain smug in my own stupid cocoon that I created for myself...is that what every person is doing...there definitely should be something that can be done to address issues like this...when i see these things, i crave more to work for something worthwhile touching people's lives rather than right some crap code...
So is social service is what I want to do...No again...I want money too...But my work itself should be in such a way that it enables me to affect life.
No, I am not getting anywhere...I don't know what I want...I simply don't know...
Or rather, let me put it this way...why am I working...it is simply because of the same reason i did so many things in the past...why did I go to school, why did i go to college...simply bcoz that's wat the society did...soceity defined a timetable for life...and i followed it religiously...society respected education and money, and here i am...chose anna univ coz the topper is supposed to do that...chose comp soc as that's supposed to earn u a high pay job...chose MS coz that's supposed to be THE place for CS engineers...
It feels totally disgusting to see that I am doing nothing more than executing a timetable set by "I-dunno-who" or "rather no-one-knows-who"...
I've started questioning so many things that hav been taken for granted....why do u marry...why do u work...why do u do so many n other things...
i know that the more i question, i don't get anywhere...it all boils down to a simple answer: "I don't know"... At this point, all that I am going to do is to simply accept...NOT the society, but the simple fact that I don't know...I choose to rather remain confused rather than living in stupid conclusions...
Huh, feels better now...
A Snapshot of me: Getting Things Done
3 years ago
7 comments:
I identify with the "conclusion" :) & believe that time & thought add clarity!
-Anbu-
hhmmm I can relate to it! believe me!
:-)
That's what i shall do: Smile. And that's all i can do.
At least now that we know we don't know, we know that we are in a pit. But at least we are not digging deeper into the pit by coming to conclusions, by explaining away the humanity which tries to respond to the existence.
Knowing can't be far off....
The title of your post is a very good summary :)
Sadhguru used to say, a spiritual person looks at a situation and asks "What needs to be done". He/she does not have any predefined agendas. If we take this as a parameter, it pretty much blows up a lot of 'do this do that' advice.
Ultimately, I guess it's what you make up to be your purpose, and when you truly find it out, the courage to take the leap.
Life's full of such crossroads with direction boards that keep swirling with the winds. :-)
>>But my work itself should be in such a way that it enables me to affect life.
My friend chose to join MBA at the Institute of Rural Management, Anand, Gujarat in pursuit of similar ambitions.
I think these are the most sensible questions.
nice post yar...
Work From Home India
Post a Comment